Gossip Girl: They Shoot Humphreys, Don’t They?
Little J. has finally made her official society debut and of course she does it with a bang, but as always getting there is never easy. And of course there was the heavily hyped threesome in this episode as well. Opening with Jenny looking better than she has in a while, some (slightly) better extensions and a pound less eyeliner, she is soon confronted with the Queens of the other prep schools in town and realizes she needs to step up her game before the cotillion by landing the best date, Graham. Serena, true to form, has too much game and after accepting Tripp’s offer for a PR job on his staff they start to get too close for comfort. Even her first day on the job the two are starting to get dirty looks from others staff members, who know all too well how these things go in politics. Tripp’s wife didn’t appear this week, but from what we learned last week she is not somebody to be messed with and Serena had better watch herself. Back at NYU Dan, Vanessa and Olivia are chilling around campus when the rumor mill starts to generate buzz of another fake Twilight movie for Olivia. I really liked the nerd troika that followed them around this week, reminded me of the hilarious nerd villains of the often maligned Buffy the Vampire Slayer season 6. Dan and Vanessa read an article of 15 quintessential college experiences and decide the best way to get Olivia to stay is to let her experience as many as possible. This leads to many presumed off camera antics, fountain yoga, keg stands and the like, personally I can’t imagine any of them being fun with a wet blanket like Vanessa around but it’s TV I give them a pass. Eventually they’ve knocked out 14 of 15 and the only one left…threesome. As soon as she reads it Olivia throws back another shot and proceeds to kiss Dan then Vanessa…cut to the three of them in bed at the end of the episode. After all the promotion for this I thought they found the worst possible permutation for a threesome on the show, but it was still a bit of naughty fun. As the big debutante cotillion approaches Jenny still cannot secure her date, mainly because of Eric’s petty sabotage. A new homely Constance girl tries to suck up to Jenny by securing her Graham as a date, but Eric would rather Jenny go with his boyfriend, Jonathan. Eric’s motivation in all of this is questionable at best, he claims to be doing it to save Jenny from herself and the mean girls, but really I think he just likes the scheming as much as anybody else in this show. Jenny manages to piss off Blair who ends up helping Eric get Graham to escort Homely Girl leaving Jenny stranded and alone…luckily it is Nate to the rescue and Little J ends up with a hot, well bred college escort and secures herself the position as the Queen of Queens of the Upper East Side. Honestly, I always sort of root for Jenny in these situations and with Eric backstabbing her for not so clear reasons I was happy to see her triumph. But Eric has vowed to take her down once and for all and now has the help of Homely Girl, still my money is on Little J. Yeah, and also that Anya Marina cover of “Whatever You Like” was freaking awesome: